3 Quick Tips to Improve Your LinkedIn Profile
Many years ago, I was doing outplacement consulting and supporting clients who were in transition. At some point during every engagement, we talked about networking as the best strategy to find a new job. I’ll never forget Derek.* After spending a couple of decades at his company, the idea of networking was scary to him (understandably so!) and he was resistant to trying it. After several weeks, Derek arrived for a coaching session all excited. Me: “You’re awfully excited today.” Derek: “I’ve been networking!” Me: “That’s awesome! Tell me all about it!” Derek: “I sent LinkedIn invitations to ten new people.” 🤦🏻♀️ As you will recall from past newsletters: It is not seeing how many new connections you can wrack up on LinkedIn. To be clear, the basic premise of LinkedIn is connecting and building new relationships. So there’s nothing wrong with sending connection requests to people to broaden your reach. The mere act of “linking”, however, is not in and of itself networking. Now, let’s talk about LinkedIn etiquette. Send a Personalized Invitation How many times have you received (or sent!) a LinkedIn request without a personalized message attached? Because the functionality on LinkedIn changes depending on the platform, you can unwittingly send a connection request without including a note. Mistakes aside, it’s helpful and suggested to provide someone with a frame of reference for the connection. Adding a message is especially important if you haven’t actually met the person – make sure to let them know why you’re looking to connect. Another benefit is that a year from now when you’re scrolling through your connections and trying hard to remember who this person is, you can look at the message you sent with your connection request and be reminded of how and why you connected. Know Your Platform As mentioned above, the process for making a connection request will look different on your computer vs. your mobile device. (If you’re a LinkedIn veteran, you can skip the tutorials below.) Here’s what it looks like on my Mac. When I’m getting ready to send an invitation to connect, I always pause to remind myself of which platform I’m on so I don’t inadvertently send one without a personal note. The mobile interface is a bit less intuitive for me. Focus on the Relationship First Every week I receive at least a couple of connection requests from people who are in business to support coaches. Here’s a screenshot of a recent invitation I received. Last I checked, I am not in marketing, and I’m not in non-profit. And the person didn’t specify why they wanted to connect so there’s little incentive for me to click the “accept” button at first blush. Here’s another. This person hasn’t told me anything about who they are or what they do, and they haven’t indicated why they’re reaching out to me specifically vs. someone else. Bottom line, do your research first, be intentional about why you’re connecting, and emphasize building a relationship before anything else.
The Hidden Power of Small Shifts
A couple of years ago, I worked with a brilliant client with a unique and sought-after skill-set. She had a strong reputation within her organization and the latitude to focus on interesting work. She just had one teeny, tiny, eensy, weensy problem. She was so focused on people-pleasing and not making waves that the words “No.” or “Can I get back to you?” weren’t in her vocabulary. She reminded me of one of those machines that rapidly fires baseballs at you during batting practice. Before you have time to think, the next ball is hurtling toward you at 90 mph. Her brain was saying “No! No! No!” but her mouth was rapidly firing “Yes! Yes! Yes!” to any and all requests that came her way. You can guess where this is going. Yup. Burn out. She was overwhelmed with the volume of work, exhausted from working nights and weekends to try and keep up, spending less time with her family, and she struggled to find any time for her own hobbies and interests. Resentment started to build. The longer this went on, the more she questioned her contribution. It’s hard to feel good about your work when you’re overwhelmed and exhausted. So, what changed? Well, for one, I started coaching her, so there’s that. 🙂 Through coaching, she gained insight into why she was saying “Yes!” instead of “No.” or “Can it wait?” Here’s what she uncovered: Armed with this information, she began to make small changes. The more she repeated the changes, the more she strengthened new neural pathways in her brain. Over time, those small shifts became second nature to her and yielded big results. Specifically, she: In her own words, “It’s helped me make a more sustained and meaningful impact in my work.” Fast forward to today, and she’s crushing it. She started her own business, and the strategies she put into place back then continue to support her in her new venture today. People, like my client, are often under the misconception that change needs to be made in big, bold, sweeping moves. Similar to achieving big goals, behavior change is best accomplished by breaking it down into smaller components. Does this sound like you? If something’s not working for you right now, identify the two to three small shifts you could make that would have an appreciable difference in outcomes. Then practice those new behaviors. You may be surprised at the outcomes!
7 Benefits of Networking You May Not Have Considered
In June of 2005, I experienced an event that was simultaneously one of the most painful times of my life and also one of the biggest opportunities for personal growth (isn’t that always the way?) I got laid off. It was a sucker punch to the gut. Fear of financial insecurity came barreling at me, and any confidence I might have had vanished into the ether. This, coupled with my borderline social anxiety, was a potent combination. Because instinctively, I knew that the one thing I really, really, really didn’t want to do was the thing that was going to propel me forward and help me find a job. Networking. People often assume (incorrectly) that I’m an extrovert. I’m actually highly (highly!) introverted, and reaching out to people is often uncomfortable. So it was with this wonderful mindset that I embarked on a job search.* 🙂 Here’s what I learned pretty quickly. And networking led me to my next job. In fact, EVERY job I’ve ever held (and I’ve been working since I was 13), including all of my consulting and coaching work in the last 7.5 years, has been a direct result of networking. I’ll let that sink in for a moment. With that, let’s look at the benefits of networking. Besides helping you land a job (obvs.), how else could you benefit from networking? Networking can help you: Sounds great, right? But there are only 168 hours in the week, and if you’re like many of my clients, you probably have a hectic job, families, and other commitments. You may have adopted a “head’s down” approach trying to “get it all done.” And let networking fall by the wayside. Because if you’re already exhausted and tapped out, even thinking about networking can start to feel like death by 1,000 papercuts. Lucky for you, I’m a big proponent of keeping things simple. (Except when I cook. Someday, I’ll post a picture of my kitchen mayhem. The antithesis of simple…) I’m here to tell you, you don’t need a project plan or Gantt chart to pull off networking and reap the rewards. What you do need is some level of consistent action. I don’t believe in one size fits all. This will look different for everyone – find something that works for you. Here’s your call to action: Think of someone in your network that you haven’t spoken with in over a year, then reach out. Not sure what to say? Click here to download sample email or direct message templates.
3 Common Networking Myths and How to Reframe Them
I put a stake in the ground and declared that networking is a critical life skill. Knowing how to navigate life in a relationship economy will not only enrich your life, it will also provide, hands down, the best ROI. Ever. (If you missed the last post you can grab it here.) Despite this, myths and misconceptions about networking perpetuate. (You’ve already heard me talk about one, “I’m not looking for a job, so I don’t need to network.” This statement makes my hair hurt.) Here are three more myths that may be standing in your way of increasing your social capital and tapping into the vast power that building a network has to offer. Let’s break these down and reframe them, shall we? 1. I don’t like to impose on people. → Reframe: Networking is building relationships. First off, by assuming you’re imposing on someone, you’ve put yourself in a box before you’ve even started. In the last 18 years of proactively networking, I have had exactly one person say “No.” when I asked for a meeting. Virtually everyone you ask to meet with is going to say “Yes.” They may say they can’t meet for another month, they may only offer you 15-minutes of their time, but more than likely, they will agree to connect with you. Why? Because most people want to help. Second, if you don’t ask for a meeting because you’re afraid to impose, you’ve made a decision for someone else without their input. People know how to self-manage. They’ll let you know if it’s an imposition. I invite you to think about networking as yet one more opportunity to build connections. 2. I’m not good at it. → Reframe: You are good at it. (And you do know how.) I debunked this notion last week but it bears repeating because so many people have inaccurate definitions of what networking really is. It is definitively not schmoozing at events, connecting with as many people as possible on social media, or passing out your business card. See #1. It’s building relationships. This means connecting with others, finding common ground, and maintaining those connections in some fashion. You do this all the time in many areas of your life. Networking is an opportunity to apply this skill in a different context. How have you successfully built relationships in the past? What positive impact could this have for you in a business context? 3. I don’t have time. → Reframe: We Live in a Relationship Economy. Make the time. There is a difference between having time and making time. Do you have time to run out to Starbucks for your daily Pumpkin Spiced Latte? Yes, you do. Because you love PSL, you need the caffeine boost, or running to the closest Starbucks is more enjoyable than whatever else was on your to-do list today. Whatever your reason, you’ve prioritized it. The same holds true for networking. When you know why you’re networking, and you’ve found the way to network that suits you (more on this in a future newsletter!), making the time becomes much easier. It starts with shifting your mindset about networking and its importance in your life. What activities do you routinely make time for? How could you make time for networking? Here is a networking resource for you: Give and Take. This was Adam Grant’s first book and it’s a quick read. In it, he talks about three types of networkers – Givers, Takers, and Matchers – and the benefits and downsides of each.
4 Things You May Not Know About Networking
When you hear the word “networking,” what do you think? Are you excited by the prospect of it, or does the idea of it make you want to curl up in the fetal position and hide? I wholeheartedly believe that networking is a critical life skill. So, to bridge the gap of feelings on the networking scale, I am offering you a series on networking. My hope is that if you’re a novice, you’ll learn strategies that make networking feel easier (or maybe less scary!) If you’re a seasoned networker, my hope is that you walk away with a new networking nugget. If you are someone who doesn’t see the point in networking, I hope I can shift your perspective. 😊 I often hear people say, “I don’t need to network, I’m not looking for a job.” I can’t judge. That used to be me. Until I was out of a job and didn’t have a network to lean on. Today I know the value of having social capital extends far beyond the need to look for a job. People will also often say to me, “I’m not good at networking.” I beg to differ. Here are four key concepts to know about networking. 1. Networking is building relationships. I’m going to go out on a limb and suggest you do this in your personal life all day long. When it comes to networking for business – job search or otherwise – you’re simply applying your existing relationship-building skills in a different context. 2. We live in a relationship economy. Work (and life) gets done with and through other people. Case in point: The more you network, the more connected you are (Queen Of The Obvious over here…) 3. Being a connected leader gives you a strategic advantage. Being a connected leader will increase your confidence, competence, visibility, productivity, engagement, and influence. 4. In a relationship economy, connections are your currency. The common thread in all of this is about harnessing the power of relationships. Relationships that provide you with access to information, people, and resources. Brian Uzzi and Shannon Dunlap wrote a great article for the Harvard Business Review entitled How to Build Your Network. In it they say “What separates successful leaders from the rest of the pack? Networking; creating a tissue of personal contacts to provide the support, feedback and resources needed to get things done.” Mic drop. So, to recap:
2 Overlooked Ways to Improve Your Leadership Skills
There is no shortage of ways to develop your skills as a leader. With a few clicks on your computer, you could grab a book (or 10), and enroll in any number of online learning, leadership, mentoring, or coaching programs. These aren’t bad strategies if you have the time, the resources, and the focus to follow through on them. But there are also plenty of ways to build your leadership fluency and efficacy in real-time simply by being curious and putting yourself in someone else’s shoes. Obvious and overlooked strategy #1: There is one question I repeatedly find myself asking clients. “Have you asked?” Coaching conversations cover a wide range of diverse topics, environments, and politics, and the question always applies. Why? Because inevitably, clients are trying to work through a question or a problem that requires involving the people impacted by the solution. Yet they are trying to figure out the solution in a vacuum. If you’re struggling to work through a challenge, look to engage others in the process. Then ask them what they need. Obvious and overlooked strategy #2: “We are not all in the same boat. We are all in the same storm. Some are on super-yachts. Some have just the one oar.” The above quote was penned by writer Damian Barr at the beginning of the pandemic. It’s made its way around the world and is a powerful example of true empathy as it aptly describes the disparity between the haves and the have-nots. Empathy means that you can emotionally identify with someone else. You can understand what they are feeling in a particular situation. This substantially changes how you interact with others and your outcomes as a result. If you want to up your game, build your empathy game. In her blog post “This is your brain on empathy”, neuroscientist Dr. Sarah McKay lays out six steps for training your brain to be more empathetic. (And you know she’s awesome because her name is Sarah!) 🙃
The #1 Mindset Hack I Keep Coming Back To
“Sometimes you’re the windshield. Sometimes you’re the bug.” – Mary Chapin Carpenter You may have seen me write about mindset before. My own “neuroagility” is a daily focus for me because it’s the number one tool in my proverbial leadership toolbox. Yet, despite my best efforts, occasionally I have days where I am most definitely the bug. Haters gonna hate, and life’s gonna get “lifey.” On these days, I am more intentional about my wellbeing (diet, exercise, mindfulness, water intake, social interaction, etc.) But the single biggest thing that consistently helps move me toward a better state of mind is…wait for it… reaching for the next best thought (NBT). Let’s say your car breaks down at the most inopportune time, forcing you to completely rearrange your entire day while you sit and wait for a tow truck. This would be enough to frustrate even the most Zen of us. Reaching for the NBT can help shift a taxing situation into a less stressful one. Examples of NBTs might be: ➡️ “I’m so glad it’s a beautiful day and not snowing while I wait for a tow.” ➡️ “Thankfully, I can afford to pay for the car repairs.” ➡️ “Isn’t it great I broke down in a neighborhood vs. a busy freeway?” You get the picture. It’s enough to move me to a better frame of mind and increased energy which will always yield better outcomes. A deceptively simple practice with great results. And if you like to geek out on mindset like I do, here’s a great podcast that I think is worth 49 minutes of your time (and a little less if you skip over the ads like I do.) 🙂
3 Unfussy Ways to Be More Authentic
I met with my marketing consultant recently (who is such a gem of a human being I call him “My Guy Nick”) and asked how one of his product launches was going. What I got was a professional yet unvarnished answer about what was working well and what could be different. It was so refreshing! Had he given me a pat answer that everything was fabulous, I wouldn’t have held it against him. I am his client, after all, and conventional wisdom would say, “Don’t air your dirty laundry.” Instead, his authenticity paved the way for a mutually beneficial conversation. Too often, people are looking to save face and not show any kinks in the armor. I would know. I did this for a long time. And I got better results when I started to share more of my humanness. This can be harder in organizations where it may not be culturally appropriate or psychologically safe to do so – where saying “I don’t know.” can feel like the kiss of death. But I’m perpetually optimistic that balance exists and allows people to be more transparent and true to themselves without committing career suicide in the process. Here are three ways to lean into your authenticity: What opportunities do you have to show up more authentically?
What is an Executive Coach?
…And why do I need one? People hire coaches for all kinds of reasons. They want to: The scope of coaching topics is as diverse as each client is unique, regardless of their goals. The one commonality among my clients is that they all want something to be different. For that to happen, you have to be willing to do things differently. While the skills you possess served you really well to this point, they may not be the same skills you need now to achieve your big, hairy, audacious goals. So, you’ll give me advice on what to do? Um, no. That’s consulting. What does an executive coach actually do? OK, a formal definition for you is: Professional coaching focuses on setting goals, creating outcomes and managing personal change. Other service professions, like consulting and psychotherapy, are based on the wisdom and expertise of the professional. In coaching, you – the client – are the expert. Your coach’s role is to ask powerful questions, act as a sounding board, provide objective assessment and observations, listen fully and actively, challenge your blind spots, and foster shifts in thinking that reveal fresh perspectives. Source: International Coaching Federation Think of me as your personal confidante, cheerleader, champion, and occasional ass-kicker. Coaching is a bit like a road trip across the country. There are lots of routes to get you from one coast to the other. We’ll start by looking at your goals and where you want to go, then we’ll map out a personalized route to get you there. I’ll take you through a structured process and offer tools grounded in neuroscience to help you figure out what to pack for your trip – the values, skills, mindsets, and behaviors that will help you to be successful – as well as the items there’s no longer room for in the suitcase. The trip includes pit stops for idea generating, data gathering, synthesis, and experimentation. Then one day you pause and realize you are further along in your journey than you realized. Hmm? sounds a little -woo woo- to me? Coaching can seem like a murky endeavor if you’ve never experienced it before. Anyone I’ve coached will tell you they have come out of the experience with more clarity and confidence, new skills, and a new mindset. And many report that the changes they make at work also create massive shifts at home. Still not sure? Think about your favorite author, athlete, musician, opera singer, or other elite performer in their field. They didn’t achieve success by sitting at home alone thinking their way to higher performance. Somewhere along the way, they had a coach guiding and supporting them, keeping them focused on their goals, and cheering them on. OK, I’m sold. Now what? Great! Use this link to schedule time for us to chat about your goals and see if we’re a good fit for each other.
How to Hire an Executive Coach
So, you’re thinking about hiring a coach! Before you Venmo anyone, make sure it’s a good match. First off, congratulations on investing in yourself! Even if your organization is paying for your coaching, the process is an investment of your precious time, focus, and energy. It’s not a “check the box” activity. And it will be the best gift you ever give yourself. Pinky swear. How do I find the right coach? I looked online and my search turned up 5,694,322 coaches in my area. Yes, there are a lot of us out there! You definitely want to do your due diligence before hiring someone. If you hire the wrong person, you may not achieve the results you want or enjoy the process, and you may start to resent the coach. Not the best investment of your hard-earned money. Hiring a coach doesn’t need to be complicated. I’ve hired many coaches and I am regularly hired by others, so I have some insight into what makes for a good hiring process. Here’s a suggested approach: OK, I’ve got my interviews lined up. Now what? Be prepared with questions and ask everyone the same questions. This may be obvious, but it will help you to compare coaches and make an informed decision. Not sure what to ask? Here are some suggestions: How do I know if the coach is a good fit? Deciding to engage in a coaching relationship is a two-way street. You want to determine that the coach is going to meet your needs, and likewise, the coach wants to ensure that you’re a good fit for them. Because you’ll be working so closely, it’s important to you know what’s important to you (see above!) and feel some type of connection. (This is why the introductory meeting is often referred to as a “chem check”, or “chemistry check”) Not feeling the “love connection” after your chem check? Probably not the right coach for you. How do you know if I’m a good fit for you? I have my own litmus test for deciding if a client is right for me. We’re a good fit if: If the answer to these questions is yes, we’re a go on my end! We’re not a good fit if: Ok, now what? If you’ve done your research and the “we’re a good fit” list above sounds like you, let’s do a chem check! Click here to jump on my calendar.