A quick story for you.
Pete* had just come out of a tense meeting with senior stakeholders, and he was frustrated, to put it mildly. He came to our session fired up and ready to “set the record straight.”
He felt like people were second-guessing him and didn’t trust his judgment, and his first instinct was to go on the defensive.
But as we talked, something became apparent. It wasn’t the feedback that was getting in his way.
It was the story he was telling himself about what the feedback meant.
In his mind, Pete had created a narrative that said:
- They don’t trust me.
- I have to prove myself again.
- Their questions were an attack.
He realized he was reacting to the story he had created in his head, not the facts of the situation (e.g., was the data he presented accurate, how did the strategy impact other areas of the business, etc.) With that insight, his energy shifted.
His strategy didn’t change. But the story he was telling himself did, which changed his mindset and how he showed up in the conversation.
This is what I mean when I say mindset isn’t fluff.
It’s a strategic aspect of your leadership. Because the mindset you bring to a situation shapes:
- What you notice
- What you assume
- How you show up
- How people respond
- And what happens next
When your mindset is in check, it allows you to lead more effectively, and from a place of strength, vs. anger, resentment, fear, etc.
It changes outcomes and saves you from potential self-sabotage and burnout. Win-win!
Mindset work isn’t a “soft skill”. It’s not a “nice to have.” And it’s definitely not a new-age, woo-woo leadership hack. It’s a core leadership skill.
In fact, research suggests that leaders with a positive mindset see higher levels of performance and better decision-making abilities, among other things (Gottfred & Reina, 2021.)
If you need to check your mindset:
- Take a beat and pause.
- Name what’s happening – your emotions, thoughts, and physiological responses.
- Ask yourself, “Is this true?”, and “What else could be true?”
- Respond according to facts, not story, conjecture, or emotion.
- See what begins to shift.
That’s what Pete did, and he walked into the next meeting with a lot more clarity and a lot less spiciness.
That’s mindset.
And it’s worth getting fluent in.
*Not his real name.
